Lose Everything
by Thine Dreamer Doth Take Flight
Summary: A little story for Carrie and Thief Bakura. Read or don't.


_A/N: Inspired by recent readings and thoughts, I thought I'd write a One-Shot for an unlikely coupling for Carrie. Yes, I do realize I've paired her with quite a few people in different stories. Originally it was Yugi, then it was Yami, then there was that One-Shot with Kaiba, and then there's that one with Joey. Yes, she sounds like a ho. But mostly every character in the **Yu-Gi-Oh!** world is paired with everyone else, so why not let Carrie explore? It's not like she's landing all the main characters in one story, is it? No, all the stories are unrelated, thus she is not a ho. But anyway, let's get on with it. I hope you like what I have written here. This takes place sometime after **Entangled Strands** and past the point when Yami/Atem went to the Spirit World, okay? Please read on and enjoy._

* * *

**Losing Everything**

_How can I go on…when I've lost everything I've ever held dear?_

The question hung in the air with an air of uncertainty and gloom, shrouding the world in uneasy despair.

It had been exactly two weeks, three days, seven hours, and forty-five minutes since Carrie had lost the man she had loved for three years. The pain hadn't lessened any for her in that time; the scar on her heart ached as if it was a wound inflicted anew whenever she woke every morning, a pain which remained with her long after her eyes fluttered close in the dark of the night. It reminded her of all the loss she had suffered since starting her life over in Domino City, and that in turn made her feel more lost than before.

Her loneliness was so great, she couldn't even bring herself to spend time with those she still had left. If they saw her at all, it was only in glimpses when they stopped by her house. The depressed blonde hadn't even shown up at her job at Kaiba Corp. despite the boss knowing where she lived and having an affinity towards her already. He hadn't said anything to her yet…Not that she cared. She was too empty to really think about what Kaiba might do to her. She had just enough thought to feel guilty about ditching her friends, but not enough to act on that guilt.

She knew they were worried. She had seen Jessica, Mai, Serenity, and Mako giving her strange glances whenever they thought she wasn't looking. It wouldn't be long before they and the others would stage an intervention. And why not? She was always sneaking off at night to the grave of her dead dark spirit and that of her dead best friend to have someone to talk to whenever she felt her loneliness. If she even came back home in the morning, it was a miracle. She never realized how much she would miss Mirage and Yugi until they were taken from her by a cruel twist of fate by a woman who served death, and now that they were gone like Atem, she had no one to disclose her pain to that would really understand.

Tristan. Tea. Joey. Duke. Marik. Ryo. Karley. Ishizu. Mokuba. Alyssa. Odion. Mai. Serenity. Jessica. Mako. None of them would understand her suffering. They had lost a friend, a nuisance, and a spirit friend. She had lost a best friend, a dark spirit that cared a great deal for her and for whom she cared a great deal, and a lover. Not only that, but when he had left, her mummy Guardians went with him. She had lost seven very important people in her life…

And all within the course of a year.

Such a loss was a heavy burden on her soul.

Tonight was just as bad as all of those before it; they were all the same since Yami went away. The green-eyed girl didn't even try to fight off the pain as she knew far too well it wasn't going anywhere and fighting it would just lead to her being engulfed by it. She just changed out of her nightclothes into something more comfortable before forcing her window open. Jumping out the window every night from the second floor took its toll on her legs since she no longer had Mirage's magic or the Puzzle's power to protect her anymore, but she was too numb to consider it. She just did it and went along her way, trying not to think. Thinking led to reminiscing, and reminiscing led to more pain.

It took awhile to reach the grave hidden in the forest, but she knew the path by heart. There was one other who would know it just as well, though she had hardly seen him since his defeat at Atem's hand. She wondered if he was still alive after all he had been through, being part of Zorc and all, and convinced herself sometimes that those few times she saw him she was seeing his ghost created by her lonely imagination. She wished he had never fulfilled his destiny to go against Atem, but as he had told her once, he couldn't turn to the light without completing his mission to the dark. He had done that and more, and he had almost brought about the end of the world. Even so, she had to admit that it didn't feel like his heart had been in it. His heart hadn't been turned towards darkness as strongly ever since Mirage had been killed by Nephthys. She wondered if he was still around if he would be the new hero in their story.

If only it was possible…

Lightning flashed across the sky and thunder boomed, alerting the absentminded girl that it was raining. She glanced down at her clothes only to realize it had been raining for some time now—she just hadn't noticed. The rain used to provide her some comfort from her suffering, but not anymore. It just served to remind her of her loneliness and pain. It soaked her to the bone with coldness. She just didn't feel it as she didn't feel much anymore now that she was so alone. She just continued on her way, hoping to talk to the dead about her misery and her doubts and her thoughts.

And what were those thoughts?

Of the end, for what was the point of continuing when she had lost everything?

Carrie slid on a wet rock on her path and stumbled, lurching forward and unable to stop herself from falling. The sensation of it did not scare her; nothing did anymore. It didn't matter if she fell in the mud—she wouldn't be around much longer, anyway. Maybe the collapse would create some feeling in her again…if she was lucky.

But before she could hit the ground, a pair of pallid hands reached out and grabbed her by the shoulders, holding her up. They were rough enough to keep her up, but gentle enough not to alarm her. It would have surprised her had she any real feeling left. As she was righted by the mysterious person, she tiredly glanced over her shoulder to see who it was only to receive the shock she had previously been lacking. It was Thief Bakura, who should have been long gone with Yami, back from the abyss. She wondered how he could possibly be alive if Yami was gone. How could he still be here? Why was he still here? Why had he come here on this night when he had failed to show up beforehand?

"You should be more careful, Carrie," Thief Bakura muttered, releasing her and stuffing his hands in the pockets of his dark jacket. "I may not be there to catch you the next time you fall."

"…Bakura…," Carrie murmured, unable to form her questions.

"Let's not stand here in the rain. I know where you really want to go, and it's not much farther," Thief Bakura said. "I don't need to tell you that, seeing as you come here every waking night."

…_Have you been watching me this whole time? _Carrie wondered as she started walking towards Mirage's grave again with Thief Bakura at her side. _Is what I saw of him before …Was it really him? How could he have survived when so many others have faded from my life? How can this be?_

"I can see you have questions. The look in your decrepit eyes tells all," Thief Bakura remarked without looking over at her. "It seems we both have things we would like to know of the other. Hopefully we will find our answers when we come to her place of rest. Though I must say I know most of mine from seeing you out here at night…I'd rather just hear them from you. It would confirm or deny my assumptions better than I could do alone, and I feel you may need the companionship."

Carrie would have asked, but she already knew why he would think that. If he had indeed been watching her since Yami went to the spirit world, he would know how close to the edge she was at this point. Perhaps that was the reason he had chosen to reveal himself to her tonight. He knew what lied within her heart, the pain she was suffering. Did he want to stop her from falling into the abyss of despair, or was there another motive for his sudden involvement in her life?

The simple little stone that marked Mirage's final resting place came into view as lightning flashed across the sky again. Carrie stopped and stared, remembering her darkness's curse. Mirage had been forced to feel the pain of every living thing on Earth, and whoever held her within had their pain magnified tenfold for her. Such a curse Carrie could never have endured or else she would have fallen into madness long ago. In the end, Nephthys had cut off Mirage's connection with the pain of the world to end her life forever, which was a blessing and a curse conjoined as one. It freed Mirage but took her away at the same time. Carrie wished she had the same deal now since she was suffering so greatly from her own pain; she wanted it all to go away just like Mirage's had, even if it meant her death which she craved so.

"…It's not fair…," Carrie whispered sadly.

"Life seldom is," was Thief Bakura's reply. He put an arm around her shoulders that was meant to be comforting, but she took nothing from it. "But…She sacrificed herself for the good of the world, an act she never would have done had she not known you. You changed Mirage from her darkest to something almost good, and that is why she defied Nephthys and took death so that you and Karley would live to save the world."

"…I know…But look at the cost. Her life, Yugi's…Then that of Yami and the Guardians …It's far too much for me…," Carrie morosely admitted. "…Do you…Do you understand what I'm going through…? I mean…I know you just lost her…But…"

Thief Bakura nodded once. "Yeah. I understand a little. Having lost her was more painful for me than it was for most…Only your pain could possibly rival it there, seeing as she was once a part of you. For me, it was because I held her in my heart more than anything else in this world. I loved her, and that is something I have never said before nor will I ever say it again. The pain of losing her…It's tremendous." He glanced knowingly at Carrie and added, "But it is nothing compared to what you must be going through. You've lost a part of yourself and your closest friend as well as that of your lover. Had I been in your place, I don't know what I'd do."

"Bakura…How is it that you're still here? Shouldn't you have gone to rest when Yami did? Or at least, shouldn't your soul have been demolished when Zorc was destroyed by the combined might of the Egyptian Gods?" Carrie asked.

"Ah. That is an interesting question. How can I still be around when the Pharaoh crushed me and is no longer here to stand by your side?" Thief Bakura mused. "When you returned from the past, I was already gone within my own body because that is where I was sent after my defeat at Atem's hand. You see, a spirit such as mine cannot be granted passage to the spirit world like your precious lover. If I were to go anywhere at all, it would be the underworld or your hell. Being granted time to live again is the better option, I would say." His passive smile turned into a frown. "Though I must admit, sometimes I wish I was dead. This place is lonely without Mirage, and of course I cannot really reveal myself to those you call friends. They would see me as the evil I am and try to be rid of me in one way or another."

"…You revealed yourself to me," Carrie murmured.

"I know I can trust you not to touch me. Broken as you are, you probably couldn't even fight off Rex or Weevil," Thief Bakura pointed out.

"Sad thing is that's probably true," Carrie agreed.

"Why do you come to speak with the dead every night? She and Yugi can provide no answers for your misery," Thief Bakura commented.

Carrie gave the slightest rise of her shoulders that may have been an attempt at a shrug. "Who else am I to turn to? None of my living friends would understand. They haven't really lost as much as I have. Sure, Yugi and Yami were their friends, but what about the others? Mirage meant little more to them than a nuisance, and the Guardians never really fit in with them. I was the only one who had any real ties to them—besides you and your love for Mirage, of course—and thus I'm the only one who understands what I'm feeling. If Yugi was alive and not buried because of me killing Nephthys or Mirage was still a part of me, they would understand. That's why I come to their graves every night. Even in death, they are the only ones who understand what I'm going through."

"And then you tire yourself out with misery and fall asleep on their graves. How poetic," Thief Bakura muttered. "One of these days, you might not wake up."

"I know. That's what I'm hoping for," Carrie admitted.

"Well, there's a dark thought," Thief Bakura remarked with a hint of surprise.

"I realize that, but…Bakura, I just can't go on like this. I've lost so much that I've held dear in the course of a year…And for what? So my boyfriend could leave me for the spirit world and I could be alone again? What do I have to live for? How can I…hold on when I've lost so much…?" Carrie weakly asked, tears fresh in her eyes as the faces of her loved ones long dead flashed through her mind.

"With an attitude like that, then just go ahead and die," Thief Bakura bluntly said, mildly shocking Carrie and making her look at him in the eye. The man with fluffy white hair held no pity for her in his body, but his brown eyes told a different story even if he wouldn't show much. "You have more to hold onto than you think. You have your little sister who would be all alone if you were to disappear. You have your friends who would have lost another if you were to drop away into the abyss. And then there's me. You and Ryo are all I have left. If you were to die and go to the afterlife as Mirage went to the underworld, I would be just as you are now…A decrepit human being with very little to live for."

He unexpectedly reached over and wrapped his arms around her fragile form, pushing her head gently into his chest as she continued to cry. "You cannot dwell in the past, love. To do so will only end in your insanity. Take it from one who knows that all too well from living in the past while in captivity within the Millennium Ring. You must learn to see past the pain and realize what you have can be good enough. It's hard now and I'm not saying it will ever get any easier…But you will be able to do it as long as you don't fall into the abyss. And as long as I have breath in me, I won't let you die. I swear it."

"…You've been watching over me for awhile, haven't you…? I mean…I thought I saw you every now and then…I just thought you were dead, too and convinced myself I imagined it…imagined you, rather," Carrie whispered. "There were nights when I would fall asleep on Mirage or Yugi's grave when it was freezing cold…and yet when I woke up…I felt warm, like someone was close to me just before I became conscious…I thought I was crazy and just playing with fate…Was it you…?"

As he gently stroked her back, he simply replied, "I believe you know the answer to that question, Carrie."

"Why do you care so much about me? Is…Is it because of Mirage once being a part of me? Is she the only reason you want to keep me around?" Carrie wanted to know.

"No, Carrie. There's more to it than that. The answer is actually pretty simple. You cared about me when you had no reason to do so, knowing I was set on destroying Atem as well as the world. You wanted to believe there was good in me when no one else did; you believed I could change. I didn't want to believe it myself, but look what happened. I helped you kill someone who used to work for me in destroying the world. And then when I had to fulfill my destiny, it was not desirable for me because I knew it would hurt you. Damn it, Carrie…I hate to admit it, but you managed to get under my skin in your own way without me having to think of your connection to Mirage," Thief Bakura told her rather bashfully for him. "You have changed me, Carrie, just as you changed Mirage before her untimely end."

"…Really?" Carrie sounded doubtful as her gaze drifted to the ground.

"Really. And that's why you have to go on living. I already lost one woman that meant a great deal to me. I cannot afford to lose another. I cannot afford to lose everything."

There was desperation in his voice that Carrie had never heard before. She had never known Thief Bakura to plead in any situation, not even when he was on the verge of losing everything he had worked for over the course of five thousand years. But now he was pleading with her to stay alive for his sake because she and his hikari were all he had left. She hadn't realized how alone he was—except for the fact she hadn't even known he was alive until tonight—compared to her. She had many friends and family left beyond those she had lost. Thief Bakura had much less; he couldn't even reveal himself to the world lest he be ridiculed for what he had done in his past. He would always be alone.

"…Oh, Bakura…I'm sorry…," she whimpered.

"Don't be. How could you know? I kept myself hidden from everyone. You had no idea," Thief Bakura assured her, continuing to rub her back comfortingly. "Just promise me you'll hold on. The world would be a sorrowful place without you."

"Will…Will you help me hold on, Bakura? Even when the pain is overwhelming… When I can't turn to the others…When I'm about to give up…Will you be there for me?" Carrie wanted to know.

"Always," Thief Bakura vowed.

"…I wish you were this kind earlier," Carrie murmured. "You know…Like when Carl did that terrible thing to me…and I was in pieces…"

"I wish I could have been there, but you had your friends then and my heart was consumed with evil. And when you turned to darkness because of that pain that Dartz promised to alleviate, I did everything in my power to help Mirage bring you back to the light. You do not belong in the darkness of evil or that of despair. I want you to always be happy, no matter what it costs me to keep you so," Thief Bakura told her.

"…You…You remind me of Yami…when I first met him," Carrie admitted with a small smile. "He was…so caring and promised me so many things…"

"He had better have kept all those promises, or else if I ever see him again I'm going to kick his ass so hard his corpse reacts to it," Thief Bakura threatened.

Carrie laughed lightly. "He kept all the ones he possibly could, Bakura, so you don't have to hurt him when you see him again. Just make your peace and we'll be fine."

"What do you say we get out of this downpour before someone catches their death?" Thief Bakura suggested. "It's too late to say before we get soaked through." He gestured at their damp clothing, which had become so without them really noticing due to the nature of their conversation. The cold of such a condition had long passed through them, but if they stayed out here much longer, they might indeed get sick and, in a worst case scenario, die. The white-haired man turned Carrie around, keeping a comforting arm around her shoulders, and pointed her in the direction that would take her away from this place. "Let's get you home, love."

"I…I don't want to go home. I have a bad feeling that if I do, there will be an intervention waiting for me," Carrie said slowly. "…You know how my friends are. They are so worried about me…Not that they don't have a reason to be…"

Thief Bakura smirked. "Yes, that is quite true. Tell you what. I'll take you back to Ryo's with me and you can stay the night. You can even take my bed and I'll sleep on the couch like a gentleman."

"I'll go home with you…But you're not sleeping on the couch. I'm the guest, so I'll sleep there," Carrie stated. "…Will Ryo have a problem with it?"

"No, he lets me do just about anything as long as it doesn't involve illegal activity. Besides, he would be glad to see you after all the ditching you've done to everyone as of late," Thief Bakura remarked. "You and he have more in common than you may think."

"I don't think. My mind's numb," Carrie murmured.

"Yes, I can imagine it is. But we don't have to discuss everything out in the pouring rain in front of my beloved's grave. We should be going," Thief Bakura insisted, escorting the green-eyed blonde out of the area. He wasn't going to give her another moment to speak because he knew she would just keep them out longer and risk their health even further. She smiled a small, grim smile in response to his actions, glad to have someone to care for her and to whom she could relate again after all this time. Someone like him could keep her around for a long time and catch her when she felt like jumping into the abyss. With him watching over her, she wouldn't lose everything in despair. She had a chance at life even with so many of her loved ones dead.

_Thank you, Bakura…for everything…, _Carrie thought, closing her eyes as the last of her tears slipped out.

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_A/N: This was short for me, but it was to the point and hinted at the possible pairing of Thief/Yami Bakura and Carrie. It did seem more like a friendship pairing than a romantic pairing, but whatever. If you didn't know what they were talking about—like Yugi and Mirage's deaths because of Nephthys, for example—you might want to read my other story, **Entangled Strands**, to fill the gap. And doesn't it always seem like I'm putting Carrie in a position where she wants to die or does die but somehow someone makes her come back? Huh. Anyway, what did you think of this story? Please tell me without flaming or being rude. Thank you for reading and have a wonderful day._


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